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I always kind of told people what I love to do. I always said that I wanted to work in a certain career field. I kind of had everything paved for me. I never veered from that. And that's what people knew about me. That's what they expected. And that's what I expected of myself as well. So all of a sudden to start telling people that I was doing something new even before I didn't have my career anymore, that was terrifying.
I was so terrified of what people were going to think.
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Today we speak to entrepreneur Gretchen Schalle -Behar. After spending 16 illustrious years developing marketing strategies for well -known fashion brands, Gretchen's life, career and future got turned upside down when the now infamous five-letter word hit, COVID. With retail shops shut down, there was no work to be had. So Gretchen had to reinvent herself and lean into a desire that had lived deep within her to do her own thing. So she embarked on a journey to turn her side gig, selling skincare and makeup to her friends and family into an actual full-time business. It was a challenge.
But business was good and she was growing. But like many during that time, the isolation was really hard on her. So the moment things started to open up, she decided to post in a local Facebook group to see if any other mom entrepreneurs wanted to get together and just talk. That was the start of Mompreneurs, a networking group that as the name would suggest, focuses on creating connection and community for entrepreneurs who are mothers.
Now before you roll your eyes, this episode is not really about networking or being a mother for that matter. It's about the power of what can happen when you take personal responsibility for creating what your heart desires and more importantly, what your heart needs. As you listen to today's episode, ask yourself, what calls from your heart have you not been answering? And allow yourself the gift of wondering what wonderful things could happen if you did.
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So I am a Florida girl. I claim Florida as my home state. So I am living back here for the last 10 years. I was a military child, so we traveled all over. And I went to Florida State University, again, Florida. I always thought I knew what I wanted to do, and I did. And I went out and did it, and I was so happy to do that. I moved out to Los Angeles and started my career in fashion and that's what I always had wanted to do. I did it and I was in there for like 16 years or so. I was in that industry and I absolutely loved it and went out to LA, met my husband, had one and a half kids, one on the way and realized I was still that Florida girl that wanted to move back to my roots. We didn't have any family or anything out in California.
So that made things a little bit harder as I became a mom. So my husband talked him into it, talked to him and he was not a Florida person. He was a New Englander that had transplanted out to the West Coast for work as well. So we moved back to Florida and this time though, South Florida, I'm a Northern Florida girl, but moved to South Florida because of work, but both of our jobs, we were able to work down here in South Florida.
This part of the state, it's just so big and booming and growing. Especially where I am right here right now has just doubled since I've lived here for the last 10 years. So I moved back here, had my second child, my son, and then realized it was time to go back to work. I found myself down in Miami.
I've come from a corporate retail background, so I've worked for large corporate retailers doing marketing. And marketing visuals, I've designed window displays, I've visuals, I've traveled overseas. Really just had an amazing time doing what I was doing and was really lucky to work at two huge, amazing companies and learn so much. And just absolutely loved it. Was so glad I was able to find that in Florida because it's typically like a New York, LA type of career field.
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Did find one company down in South Florida, worked there for about five years and was loving it. Everything was going great. And then COVID. Then COVID happened. Famous last words. Then COVID happened. How many stories have this milestone in them now? For real? We're going to be unpacking this for a decade at least. We're still trying to understand what happened.
We're still trying to understand it. We're still gonna, we're gonna explain it to our kids and our grandkids. And it's gonna be a lifelong, like it's part of us. It's a part of our lives. I mean, just so many stories are kind of, I think there's like a rebirth that happened and that's been happening since COVID. And I definitely say my story was a huge part of it. There was always, I told you, my dad was in, or I told you I was part of a military family. My dad was in the military when he retired after 27 years from the air force.
He was always an engineer, a builder. He really inspired me because he was an entrepreneur. And when he retired from one career, his military career, which was a lengthy career, he kind of really got that entrepreneurial side out. That's when it really came out in him. He started his own business. He developed a lot of things, all kind of related back to the military. But I got to see that come out of him and the passion he had for it. And I always knew that side was in me.
And probably at the time when I started in my career, which I really always loved my career, I was at a creative and the I still could be my planner. I'm a little mix of kind of the creative side and I love to do all the stuff behind the scenes too. So I really always knew there was a part of me that was an entrepreneur. I just really didn't know like what to do with it. I didn't know how to do it. And I truly wasn't ready to ever take. I never felt like I was ready to take that step.
From corporate America, that safety blanket of that paycheck, having your insurance and your benefits and your 401k and all those things, you feel that it's a safety blanket. Like it's going to be there. But the truth is, it's not always going to be there because things can change. And that's what happened to me in 2020. COVID happened. I remember I had just been in New York, traveling to New York. We just got back. I actually took my daughter on a camping trip. Someone there had COVID.
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Um, we found out later that had COVID and we didn't think that it was touching us. We didn't really think that you don't think it's ever going to touch you, your community, people around you. So it did and not, we didn't, all of a sudden everything was changing. And unfortunately my company had to adapt to that. And I'm in marketing and my whole team and I were let go at that time. We were, it was retail. There were nothing, there was nothing open. Nothing was open. Our corp, all the offices are closed. We're all home.
And everything shut down and I got furloughed for a month and then was let go. But something really interesting happened during that time. So I had an interesting transition period because I didn't have that happen and then have to figure it out. I actually had something happen to me and I took a leap about a month before that. I have a friend who had started her own business. She's actually somebody I worked in Los Angeles with and I had seen her grow and developing her business.
And it was in beauty and I was like, oh my gosh, I was like, I always kind of wondered what it was, didn't really get it. She had reached out to me and I needed some skincare. So I was like, okay, why don't I just, she's like, just do it. And I was like, okay, well, I can just do it for fun. I'll get a discount. It'll be cool. So why not? I have my job. This isn't a job. So I just thought it would be something fun to do. So I took a leap and at the time I didn't really look at it as starting a business. The time it was just something I happened to do in the moment. And my husband,
It's so funny, my husband saw something in it, I believe, because I went to him and I said, do you think this is cool? Like, would this be okay? Like, do you, I just want to run it by you. Do you think this would be something that I should do? Like, it's not going to burden anybody. Like, we're going to be good. And he's like, yeah. He's like, of course, not a problem. We can totally do that. And I did. And at the time I was only really telling my friends and my family about it.
So I told him I joined this company. It's just kind of like a little side gig. Like it's for fun. I'm trying the products. Come try them with me. So it was friends and family at first. It wasn't anything I was really like full force going into. But then COVID happened. I lost my job and my husband and I kind of looked at each other and we're like, okay, so you're going to go find something else? And I'm like, I kind of feel like I was put in this place where I should be right now. This is where I'm supposed to be. I wasn't devastated.
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which is shocking because I really, really do love what I was doing. I've always loved it. I still love it to this day. So I always had that. It gave me that nudge to finally take that chance on myself that I hadn't done before. And the timing of it couldn't have been better. So we both decided, I was like, this is what I'm going to do. This is what's right for us. We were in the position. We could do it for now.
I took that leap and that's what I decided to do. I decided like, how am I going to do this? Okay. So obviously during the time it had to be online, it had to be on social media. Nothing was in person, unfortunately. So for the first year of my business, it was all online. It was all phone calls. It was all virtual and I loved it. It was really cool, totally different. It incorporated a lot of the things I already knew and loved. I was already in marketing. So I got to now market myself, which was a totally different thing than I have ever done before.
Putting yourself in front of the camera; putting yourself in front of people. That took a big leap. It's the first time I ever did a Facebook live. It's the first time I did. It was so many firsts for me. Okay, so let's pause there, because you take this leap and, I mean, you're talking about it like it's sort of fearless in that moment. No, I'm not. You can like, just the way you told the story was like, yeah!
So let's just talk about that transition, because I think a lot of people can relate to the calling, can relate to always wanting to having that urge inside, but it's not the right time, it's not the right moment, I'm not ready. And so I think it took something for you to, yes, timing happened, but it did take something for you to leap in and answer the call.
So give me a little bit of what was going on in your head in that moment and what was that like for you? Thank you for pushing me back. When you talk about something that's happened and you've moved on from it sometimes, like we have that confidence about it. But I don't want anyone to think that because you're totally right. It was not that easy at all. Part of it was because the excitement part of it, but it wasn't. I had a great support system at the time, which helps a ton.
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And I still do to this day, but I was terrified. It's a scary thing, I think because I was kind of didn't have a decision to make about leaving. If the decision for me would have involved stepping away from that safety blanket that I had in my career, it would have been more terrifying for me. And I honestly don't know if I would have ever done it. I think I would to this day still be doing and where I am, I don't think I would have taken that leap to be honest.
I maybe I would have, I hope I would have, but I don't know that I ever would have. But the terrifying thing for me is like I started this off, I always kind of told people what I love to do. I always said that I wanted to work in a certain career field. I kind of had everything paved for me. I never veered from that. And that's what people knew about me. That's what they expected. And that's what I expected of myself as well.
So all of a sudden to start telling people that I was doing something new even before I didn't have my career anymore. That was terrifying. I was so terrified of what people were going to think. That was one of the questions I had for you because often that stuff becomes our identity. Like I remember for me, so my transition was from, I was a designer, I was an art director, and I had worked really hard.
I had a third pedigree. I worked in these reputable companies. I had this resume and this portfolio. And it was like, and I had worked to build that. And then all of a sudden to like start new and say, oh, I'm leaving my career 15 years. It was like, my ego was like, I remember my ego getting like really triggered. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. I 100 % agree. I know exactly, exactly what you mean. People don't know another side of you.
People get comfortable in what they expect from you when when we change that up, it just throws everybody through a loop. So you have the I had these I had a lot of people, of course, that were very happy and excited for me. All the people for the most part that I thought would just be okay with it and excited were kind of shaken. And they didn't seem like they were kind of pushing back. They didn't really know what to say. It almost was like it was making them nervous.
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Like, but this was my decision. It truly didn't affect them. To them, it doesn't matter what I do. It shouldn't. You wouldn't think that it matters. Like if I said, Gary, I'm not gonna do what I'm doing anymore. I'm not gonna be a LimeLife Beauty Guide. I'm not gonna have my business. I'm not gonna be the head of mompreneurs. I'm gonna go out and I'm going to fly airplanes. I'm gonna be a pilot for a major airline. That wouldn't affect you really. It's not really gonna affect you.
But for some reason, it just feels, part of you feels like it's letting people down. Friends, family, the people closest to you. You wonder what people are gonna think of what you're gonna be doing next. I was going into direct sales. My idea of direct sales was, I wasn't honestly very familiar. I hadn't really done anything before. I had hardly purchased anything.
Most of my friends and family worked in corporate positions. I didn't really have any friends in any other direct sales companies. So I was really, really separated from that world. I didn't come from a community where that was accepted or that that was even talked about, not because there was anything wrong with it. It just wasn't a part of my community. So to all of a sudden do that, to do something that you technically don't even need, that you don't even need a degree for, anybody can do it.
I looked at that probably in life if I had to as maybe a negative. I was somebody experienced. I was the head of a major department. That wasn't something that I, why would you ever do that? Is what I would have probably thought of anybody else in that same position. I get it. I get it so much. And to this day, that always follows you a little bit. You have to, we'll get into that I guess, but it's tough. And that conversation took a long time with a lot of people and it takes a long time for people to get used to.
I think when the people, you show people your passion for it and how you're doing it and your excitement for it, I feel like that's helped me a lot. Overcome all of that when they see your success, when they're a part of it, when you involve them in it, because you want to share with them what you're doing, what's happening. When they get more of a window into it, I feel like it was a learning curve for me in the beginning and it was a learning curve for those around me. But I don't feel like that anymore.
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I don't feel like that it's a learning curve anymore. So it is absolutely terrifying. I was even terrified to tell my husband, quite honestly. I mean, he was, but the thing is what's amazing about him, he just, he was so supportive. Like I don't even feel like I had one eye of judgment at all when I told him. And that's just how you know you have the right person for you. When they're supportive of you no matter what. And my kids were too young to know any different. So they just know what I do now and they're a huge part of it.
So love it. OK, thank you for indulging me there. So let's go back. You you start this. You are one year into it during lockdowns. And so everything is virtual. Yeah. How there's a big learning curve, obviously. You're learning all the things you're shedding your own identity and creating a new one and all that. So how? Yeah, I guess keep sharing your story. So.
I was like a year in and I feel like I had kind of plateaued in things. The world obviously was a whole other story and I was kind of adapting my business to it as we went. And I just realized I kind of got that itch that I needed to kind of evolve, not just as a person, but also in my business as a person, my family, like we needed the next step. Like I think everybody in some way kind of probably had an itch in 2021.
2021 needed to be different than 2020. 2021 could not be the same thing. We could not continue to live the way we were living. To be secluded, people are naturally social. We don't live alone. We're supposed to be around others. And I am definitely a social person. I'm a more the merrier type of person. I will continue to invite people into a car of four when I'll invite 20 people. I just like to have everybody around.
So I really find that was one of the ways I kind of had that itch in 2021. And I was trying to think like, what can I do? Like, how can I get out there more? What are the things that I want to get back? And I really missed from being in a corporate setting and having my work friends and everything around me, I missed being able to go to lunch with people. I missed being that was part of my day. I missed going out to maybe like happy hour or something after work. I missed doing all of those things.
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So I thought, okay, well, I need to get out there. I need to meet more people. I need to put myself out there. I had already seen this amazing community at LimeLife, which had inspired me, but it was all virtual. Everything was virtual that I was a part of, just like most of us. So I had posted, I was a part of, and I still am, so many different online Facebook social media groups.
that I have found over time with moms, with women, with parents, with people who are into fashion, with people who are into beauty. I've always been in some of these groups. So I had reached out and I said, this is my story. I'm a mom. I posted a picture actually of my two kids and I. And I said, I'm a mom, ready to get back out there. I used to work in corporate. I started my own small business at home during this time. I'd love to meet other people in the same position as me.
It was just with the intention of putting myself out there and meeting more people and getting out of the house. And so we did, we met. I had a bunch of people kind of respond and I didn't know what to think of it. Turns out 12 other women met me that evening and I was honestly blown away. I had no idea and I knew none of them. I knew none of them. I did bring one friend with me who was on my LimeLife team that had joined me that worked actually in the same office as me in my corporate job.
And she had gone with me that night and 12 other people and I was just so shocked and we continued. I made it into a monthly thing and we continued to meet. I had new women coming in. I had started a chat group for us. It grew. I had to start the Facebook group for us. We had 300 women in that Facebook group by the end of the first year and then it over doubled and now we have 1800. Wow.
I grew into something that I never, it was not my full intention in the beginning to run a group like this, to be the leader of this huge networking group. But it's been one of the biggest blessings to have this. And I contribute so much to it. I know the timing, obviously, a lot of people, the timeframe and the transition out of 2020 really was a huge part of it for sure. Would it have been as successful 10 years ago? five or six years ago, I have no idea.
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But I do know that it's still huge because I welcome in like 40 or 50 women a week sometimes. And it's just incredible. Once you start building and compounding all those people, it's just the word of mouth is amazing. And we just have this amazing community now. And it officially is our mompreneur group. And it's women all over Broward County, mostly West Broward, but we have women all over.
And it's really amazing. And I actually have somebody starting another group up in the Northwest of the country that moved away and she started her own group. Your franchising. I know. Isn't that incredible? I love it. New chapter. Wow. I know. It's really every day it just it just grows and grows. It's completely amazing. And what I learned at the beginning, I've learned so many things. I mean, it's so funny how you don't ever think that you need to go on a journey and a journey could be good for everybody.
There's always a room for us to grow. Like 2019, beginning of 2020, I would have said, if you said, does something need to change? Like, what would you like to change in your life? Do you need to grow in a certain way? You unhappy with anything? I would have told you I was totally content. I was very comfortable and content for sure. But the world just has a weird way of throwing things at you. So. Yeah. No, and I think there's so many things to unpack here, but it.
In some ways, the game becomes comfort, you know what I mean? And there's nothing wrong with it. But if you look at some of the things that we aspire to, it is a certain level of comfort, certainly financially and where you live and all those things. But I think you're also pointing to the desire to grow and challenge ourselves and...
innovate in some ways, because then you can get too comfortable and that also has an impact, right? Okay, I love your story so much and I really wanted to invite you to the show because I find myself, you know, I mostly have ended up working with women in my career as a coach and very often the... If I feel a little weird talking about this because I'm not a parent, so I don't want to like sit here and mansplain.
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But very often what happens in my experience to mothers is that now their children become a limitation, a circumstance as to why they cannot do certain things and their business is one of those things that often becomes one of those things. Or how they end up working their business gets really confined because their children are being children, right?
And I also think that there's just, I think it's important to acknowledge there's an incredible amount of pressure these days on moms to be like both Instagram moms and do all the things and like, like in my day, you made a home cake.
You made a cake at home and you got a balloon and hey, happy birthday. Now it's like, it's gotta be Instagram worthy. It's like, there's gotta be all this place and all the things. And I was just like, oh my God, I'm so glad I don't have children. Cause my children would be miserable. Cause I'm just like, what? I'm not doing all that. You would do amazing. I have no...
I'm like, I'm not blowing up 700 balloons. No, no, no. You know what's funny? Kids love what they have, though. They just, they know what they know and they love what they have. I think you're right. I think you're right. But there is a lot of pressure, I feel like. We live in an Instagram world now and friends, kids are on Instagram, they're watching what their kids' birthday parties are. And so I do think there's a lot of pressure. So I also want to acknowledge that. But one of the...
that I often give moms is like, guys, just get a bunch of you together and create a little club. Like, you watch my kids tomorrow, I'll watch your kids today, and you work your business while I'm... Like, there is ways that if we get out of the sort of reactionary, because sometimes so much of being a mom, I think, is just responding to your children's needs, right? But if you can step out of that reaction and get creative, like you did...
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there's like all these opportunities that can actually happen because you're not the only mom going through this, right? You're not the only mom feeling isolated or you're not the only mom feeling like you don't have enough time or so, I mean, heck, we all feel that throwing kids is like even worse. So I love this story so much and I love that you did this because I think it's such a valuable lesson of creating what's missing, right?
And really answering, hey, I need community. I need, and what's really cool about it is that this wasn't really a business strategy for you. It wasn't like, oh, let me go network and meet people and do that. This was really what fills my cup, what fills, what lights me up. What do I need to create the safety, enthusiasm, momentum and passion to keep working my business?
Which is also really smart because a lot of us don't approach it from that way in terms of filling our cups and what do we need in order to keep going. So, yeah. Do you know, it's interesting, so much I could say about all of that. The one thing I do want to say about a very, what happened to Bibi now in hindsight when I look back at it, a very important thing about what I did and the interesting thing is when I first started this group, I, well, let me step back.
Before I knew it was a group when I was doing this. It was what it was. It wasn't for any particular purpose outside of wanting to have human connection and getting out there and talk to people and meet people. But when it started to become more and when it really started to become networking and it never has felt like networking, but I also in the beginning did have a bit of a fear in the back of my head that I didn't want to lead too forward with my business.
I didn't develop it really from the place of networking and I didn't talk about my business that much because I was a little afraid that people would not think I was genuine and they would think that this was literally just to get customers or to grow a line of life team with my company, with my business. So I was very afraid of that for a long time and I truly didn't even talk about my business for that much. Probably I didn't even mention it hardly for the first six months. They knew that I had a business at home.
27:50
I didn't really, unless we had become friends on Facebook or something, they wouldn't have seen what it was because they didn't really talk about it. And then over time, people started to ask me more questions and I realized if I'm going to put this much time into this, I need to use, do what the other women are doing. Like I allowed them to network. I didn't have rules in the group. I still really don't. You just have to be nice. It'd be nice. We want to keep that going, but, and be respectful, but I didn't talk about the business at first. I was genuinely afraid that that would turn the whole thing south.
So my group and the whole idea behind it and meeting people is always you're connecting with them as a human first. It's at a human level first. You have to, we all know that when you buy something, especially in small business, you're buying from the person. You're not buying the product. That's not what you lead with. And I do feel that that's why I have actually gotten so much success out of this for my business, my actual first business.
Because everyone has seen what I've done. They've seen the community. We help each other. We collaborate together. We do so many events together. And I do so many things for them because I do get a lot out of it. I love creating those connections. I always tell people, when you're a mom, was there a part of you, when you were going to work every day for working moms that had to leave the house and work or be away from their children for whatever reason, did you Google, like, how can I still make money and still see my kids and still have a good schedule?
I didn't really for some reason get any of this. Like I didn't get that I could be doing what I'm doing now. It wasn't in my line of sight that I could be doing any of this. So I have realized over all this time that the things that mean the most to me about my business, my group, everything is that connection and is building the community to help connect people.
connect people personally who might need it, a friend that might need it, and then also to help people build their business and collaborate. I love seeing that when I see two people meet for the first time and they connect, and then I go and I see that they're doing an event together, a live together. We've had people go into business together and start other businesses. We've had women come in. I always have women introduce themselves and tell us about them.
30:08
You don't have to go too personal, but we want to know you. Tell us about you and then for sure, tell us about your business. How did you start it? So many people want to start a business and they don't know what the first steps are. They feel so alone doing it. Women don't like to be alone. We like to help other people. We like to have that connection with others. We like to build those relationships. So they connect and then they are able to connect with others to help them in whatever part of life it is.
The group is mompreneurs, but I would say really is all women and maybe one day it'll be men too. I don't know. I'm not I don't close off anything. Everything is possible. So you invited me one day, so I had the honor of telling you too. I did. Well, they needed to meet you, Gary. I felt like they needed to meet you. It's grown me a lot knowing you and I feel like it will do the same for them. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It was so much fun. And.
I want to dig into the culture a little bit because the next question that was sort of emerging for me was really inside of leadership. And I know that you had some previous leadership experience because obviously you ran teams and you ran departments and you had to work with other departments in corporate America. So you're coming to the table with a lot of leadership. But even with that experience, I want to highlight for our listeners.
You're still in the question and the doubt and the discovery. You're like, oh, I don't want them think that I'm trying to or I want them to know that I'm genuine or I want them to know. So there's just, even with all the leadership experience that you have, there's still humanity there, right? We all still have our doubts and we still struggle. I mean, heck, I'm a leadership coach and I still have those moments quite often.
I think their leadership comes in in the handling of it, in the not avoiding it, in the still moving forward and finding a solution to work around that concern. So, I mean, you've been talking about this, but I wonder, it sounds like it happened kind of organically, but did you have an intention for the culture? Like, was there like a strategy at play or?
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where you just like just being yourself and it kind of happened or was it more intentional? Like, did you get to a point where you're like, okay, there's a thousand people hanging around now. How do I like control this? How do I lead this, steer the ship? Oh my goodness. Well, do you know what? First of all, the group always feels small to me. I know that sounds crazy when you look at the number wise, obviously we've never all been in the same room together. And I have this persona of Facebook.
I've become like, I don't know. I put up a wall with Facebook and I pretend like I know I'm putting stuff out there, but I don't look at it as like a thousand people are looking at me. I don't know. I can mentally put that in the back of my head and just do what I want to do and say what I want to say. But yes, absolutely. Do you know what? I think being a good leader is about growing and it's about showing. I show who I really am in this group. So I would say I really did everything I learned that first year.
In my business before I moved on to starting this group or developing this group over time. Everything I learned there, I feel like I took a lot of that with me. Putting myself out there in the community and taking that leap in my business, that really, it started to shape, honestly, what I believe became mompreneurs today. I wouldn't have been able to probably start this group if I hadn't started my business first. Even though...
They don't necessarily, one isn't because of the other. In some ways, they definitely are. It all started in 2020 with that start of that journey. And it was just, I feel like it was almost like a natural development to go from one to the next. So I know the way that I look at this group is we're here. I have to stick to like the main pillars of why I am now doing this. And one of them is to connect women, to have integrity in what we're doing and to be nice to each other.
It's not about competition. Like I feel like that's the thing that could really tear a group like this apart is being competitive, one -upping each other, things like that. I do stick to very strict kind of guidelines and what we can do within the group. And I definitely hold people to it. And you would think that it would be something that could limit us in certain ways, but I haven't seen.
34:46
That happening I've only seen us growing. That's what good rules do. They provide structure and guidance without like suppressing you. But you really have to when you have that many people and they want everybody wants something because you're inevitably going to get people that are there for a good genuine reason and you're gonna get people who are there to take advantage of it and it's just gonna happen at the end of the day and I just have to shut down the negativity immediately.
And honestly, I've only had a few instances in the last, well, Mompreneurs will be a group in June for three years. So we're coming up on our three year anniversary. And I have only seen a few instances that I've had to really like shut down. Everything else is of course, space book and spam and all those things come into Facebook. So yeah, do you know what? I've been really, really, you attract, you give out this energy and I feel like that same energy has come back.
And that all started when I first put myself out there in the beginning, just as a genuine mom and what I was looking to get out of it. If I would have said, I'm a mom starting a networking group, OK, great. Then maybe that would have changed and it would have gone more down that road. But that's not how I started it. And I wouldn't say that that's my advice, that you can't start something like this that way. I just think whatever the true reason you want to do something, you have to put it out there that way.
You can't put it out there as something else to cover up. If I truly was trying to do this to network and grow my business, then I should say that. I should say that this is for me to expand my network, to grow my business. This is my business. But I didn't do that. And literally the energy I initially put out in this group and continue to consistently put out in this group is what I got back. And I have women say to me all the time when we come into events, because my group is very much an in -person group.
You know, those are where the real connections happen, is when people get together face to face. You can only do so much online and I love social media for everything that it can be for us. It's definitely a huge part of everything I do. But being in person and connecting is where all the true relationships, I have not seen one relationship form specifically online that has been like a long lasting relationship. Eventually those people have to connect in another way. Even...
37:08
even if it's the way you and I, even if it's like on a Zoom, you know, maybe they repeatedly do like connect face to face virtually, but the biggest relationships, the most meaningful ones that have had the biggest impact have been people at one point getting together face to face. I'm surprised you're saying that because a lot of, you know, obviously social media has changed the game in terms of the way that we do business.
And now there's just this constant pressure to like everybody wants to be an influencer. It's like how many followers and can I get viral and can I? And I think especially in the industry that you're in when you're in beauty and there's some real big people out there pulling in some big numbers and doing some really big things with beauty. And every time I'm coaching a client, like this is like the new aspiration that they have. Like, and I'm like.
No, like there's plenty of business to be had belly to belly. And there for many of us, that is actually a much more authentic way of doing business. And I just think that deep, it allows you to create a deeper relationship. And that ultimately is much more powerful in terms of leveraging business. So I'm really glad that you're saying that it's one of the other reasons I love.
What you've done and the philosophy and idea behind Mompreneurs, because I'm like, oh my God, yes, let's get together. Yeah. And do you know what, they love it. And it's amazing. I think I told you this when you were able to join us. When the women come into the group for the first time, you know, come to one of our events for the first time, they probably have been, they've known about the group for a while, or they've been like inside of our Facebook group, but they haven't been able to, for whatever reason, make it out to an event.
And the first thing they always tell me when they come in, and it's the first time, I'm oh, you're new, like, hi. And I welcome them and they say, I've been wanting to come to these so badly for like a year, for two years. And they're like, it finally worked out. And I'm like, you tried so hard for all that time. And I just thank them and give them a hug because I think it's so amazing because I know it's not easy.
39:23
But the funny thing is, every single time that happens, that person that wasn't able to come, once they come and they see what they're gonna get out of it, they're regular. They come back immediately and I'm like, now they're able to make it a priority or maybe their schedule has changed, I'll give them that. But they become a regular because they see what they're getting out of it. Now people become masterful at handling things when they're incentivized in the right way. It really is. It's like, until they come, it's just conceptual.
You know what I mean? Like they don't really know what they're buying into. They don't really know. And then they see and it's so wonderful. I mean, I had a blast. Like that luncheon, I was like, oh my God, this was so fun. And I felt like I made some real genuine connections. I have some meetings coming up afterwards. Like it was such a clean conversation. It was just a clean space. And honestly, I hadn't been networking in years, to be honest.
Like if I, yeah, because I left New York and then I was working for LimeLife for five years and I didn't really do much networking and I relaunched my business six months ago. So now it's like, okay, time to get out there and start meeting people. So it was like for me, it was like, oh, okay. I was mostly excited though. I was mostly excited, but.
I remember, I think we should talk about this for a minute, like I remember how scary networking was when I first started. Oh yeah. Cause I am, people think that I'm an extrovert, but I'm really not. I'm an introvert. I love people and once I know you, I am like so much fun. And this is why people always think that I'm an extrovert. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. When I first walk into a room, I'm shy. I'm actually like reserved and all that good stuff.
Networking was wildly scary for me when I first started, I remember. And I'm going through that imposter syndrome that we talked about at the beginning, where all of a sudden, I'm walking into a room and I'm saying, okay, I branded myself as a life coach back then. I'm like, oh, I'm a life coach. And the only thing I have to prove it is this little business card that I designed myself. Right.
41:44
And I always say that the to me the process of getting out like the first year my biggest accomplishment was like not throwing up in one of those rooms like it was like it was that much anxiety written for me. Oh my goodness. But it was such a great learning experience and I always tell people if you networking is great for the relationships and it's great if you find the right group.
That's the thing, you have to find the right home. When you find the right home, it becomes a real, a space for you to practice talking about yourself. A place for you to practice embodying this new person that you're creating. When you start a business, you're creating a new identity, you're creating a new person. And you need a safe space to practice that, to practice walking as this new person.
And then practice like, pitching, like actually speaking about your business in a way that's not creepy, in a way that feels natural, in a way that feels authentic to you. And those are all things that require practice. And I love, networking was a gift in that regard, right? And then you make these amazing relationships in the process and some of those people become friends for life, but also become great referral sources. I got into the New York Times through networking. I got into MasterCard through networking.
I got like National Urban, like all these big clients that I've had over the years, it came from a networking referral. So I cannot, if you are scared of networking, find a group like Mompreneur, they're in the United South Florida, although they're getting ready to create chapters all over the country apparently. It can be really scary. And I think you're an extrovert, so for you it might come more naturally than some other people.
But I wanna say it is something that when you do it and you get in the right head space about it, meaning you are there to be in contribution, you are there to really get to know people, you're really there to be in service, it frees you up to have a great time and really just connect with people without the agenda of like, oh, I got a pitch or I got a sell or I got all that kind of stuff.
44:08
So what's next for you and mompreneurs? Well, a lot. Actually, we have a mompreneur cruise coming up next month. Fun. Yeah. You can still sign up, guys. We still have, I think there's still availability. So we're doing our first cruise, which I'm super excited about. We're going to, let's see, we are taking off out of Fort Lauderdale. It's the last week in April and we are going to Key West and Bimini. So it's like a long weekend.
Very excited about that. So that's like a nice like full weekend for the network. How can people find out about that? Are we going to be able to post anything? Can we give them a link? Give me all the links, all the stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I'll give you guys a link to it. OK, so we'll put the link in the show notes. Yes. So Mompreneurs, we're celebrating three years in June, as I said, and I'm super excited. We have a lot going on. So we have so many events coming up. We have an event on March 19th at El Mariachi here in Coral Springs.
And then we have events planned out right now through the summer. So I'll give you a link for that too. It has all the dates. So we have a lot going on, but also I'm gonna be launching our website soon. So I'm working on that. There's a lot of surprises gonna be in there that I'm not gonna say quite yet, but we're building up a lot of resources within Mompreneur. So yeah, stay tuned. There's things happening.
And if yes, definitely franchise. If you're interested in Monterey, where is that? You want to get this idea going in your town or your state? Definitely reach out to me. Yeah. And I will and I will help you through the process because I just want to go back for one second, Gary. Yeah. Just say you just repaint real quick because you had mentioned that I'm an extrovert. And do you know what?
I never know how to I can't label myself because I have moments where I and shy as can be and I have other moments where I'm ready to jump up on stage. Honestly, I always have a pit in my stomach. I was a mom in a bubble. I was in my bubble. I didn't have a community. I didn't even honestly, I've had the same friends for years and most of them don't live here because I don't live in my hometown. So I was never in a place doing this where it's like, oh, you had all your high school friends and you're you grew up here. Didn't have that. I've moved around a lot. I was in my bubble.
46:23
Everything I did was mostly with the people in my house or my parents who happened to live in town. So I was definitely in my bubble and I needed to get out of it. And everyone can benefit from networking, not just people who wanna have a business or grow a business or start a business. Networking and getting out into your community, finding people that you know, like you said, the right group for you, not every group's gonna be the right group for you, is so beneficial in life.
And I would say I would contribute me growing in life even more than I would in business because I am definitely a totally different person now. A part of me that always was probably there dormant has come out in the last four years and everything in my life has gotten better because of it. Even relationships I already had, everything has gotten better. Everybody needs to get out of their bubble and for moms and even dads.
Who start having kids and really start that, like they're so concentrated, we are, on the convenience of what we can do within our families and within our schedules, there is a way out of that. Sometimes it takes people a minute because when the kids are really little, sometimes you don't know another way, but you'll see, once you get out of that, even if it's just with one other family, and then you'll meet another family, and then you'll go to the park and you'll meet somebody else, that's all a form of networking.
And you can do it in so many ways. It doesn't have to be in a formal group. It could be mompreneurs. I honestly say is quite casual. It's a quite casual group, but it's beneficial for everybody. So it's not just for entrepreneurs. It's it's for all of us. And I think post 2020, it's so important for all of us to put ourselves back out there again and to get out of our normal routines because there is always room for growth. Love it. Well, thank you so much.
And I hope you come back to the show soon. I really acknowledge you for all the work you're doing and the beautiful community that you're creating. And thank you for inviting me to be a part of it, even though I'm not a mom. Wow. Do you know what? There's other people out there that benefits moms too. And I appreciate you very much. I love to be a cheerleader behind the moms. Absolutely. Any day. Yes. And my lunch date. All right, friend. Thank you so much. Have a good one. Till next time.
48:38
Yes, thanks so much, Gary. Bye, guys.
There are so many wonderful lessons in personal leadership and personal responsibility that we can learn from Gretchen's journey. But the thing that I really want to highlight is Gretchen's willingness to create what she was missing. I think many times our instinct is to wait it out, to let it pass, in essence, to avoid it. I don't have to remind anyone here that the pandemic was absolute chaos.
Life as we knew it got turned upside down and the world just stopped working. But there was also a beautiful gift from that challenge. It forced us to stop and take inventory of our lives, of what was working and what wasn't. It forced us to look inward and connect with what matters to us. Some like Gretchen embraced that process and threw themselves into the deep waters. But many didn't. Many resisted, avoided it, or even resented it.
And maybe the results ended up paying a bigger price. Mompreneurs was born out of a desire to fill her need to connect. It wasn't a business strategy or even a goal. She was simply feeling isolated and wanted to experience connection. That simple yet brave action was the catalyst for creating a networking group for 1800 plus women and still growing every day. Her actions not only impacted her life,
But also the lives of all of those other women and in turn their families, their customers, their communities, creating a massive ripple effect. So the next time you wonder if your actions really matter, if your actions really have an impact, just follow your heart and remember Gretchen and all the women of Montpeneurs. It may sound overly simplistic or even cliche, but just stop and take a look for yourself.
How many times has your heart told you to do something and you haven't listened? How many dreams or adventures lay on the shelf waiting to get to someday? Following your heart may sound a bit cliche, but it's easier said than done. It requires incredible courage, leaping into the unknown, and most of all, it requires taking ownership. I want to give a very special shout out to all the women of Mompreneurs in the Coral Springs, Florida area.
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I'm incredibly inspired by the community support and the safe space that you have all created together. Thank you so much for welcoming me with such open arms, despite my obvious shortcomings of not being a woman or a mom. If you are enjoying the podcast, I'm personally asking you to support me by either rating, leaving a review, clicking follow, or all of those things.
Most of all, please, please, please share the podcast with someone that you think will enjoy it. Remember, your actions do have an impact. I'll see you next week. Thanks for listening to this episode of The Ownership Game with your host, Gary Montalvo. Make sure to like and comment on your favorite podcast platform, as well as subscribe so that you never miss an episode.